I’m not obsessed with beauty, but as a fan of many an 80s cartoon — and as a 20-something prone to waves of nostalgia — the new Too Faced Cosmetics line caught my interest. It’s a bunch of make-up products with the face of Smurfette (of The Smurfs fame) slapped on them.

Yeah.

Now before we go any further, I’ve already gone through all of the potential blue-related jokes in my mind. I’m avoiding them. Of course, feel free to add them as you read along but know that I already came up with them so I basically have a copyright on your thoughts. I also think you’re a disgusting person.

Although not as disgusting as this person. (Strong suggestion: don’t scroll down. The image is pixelated but not enough to unscar me.)

>GIVING

>YOU

>TIME

>TO

>TURN

>BACK

>5

>4

>3

>2

>1

>LAST CHANCE…

I know! I can't believe Smurfette plays basketball either!

So anyway. Make-up. Smurfette. Yeah.

If you look at the top of a Too Faced Smurfette compact you’ll see Smurfette looking smurfin’ hot as she strikes a pose — though thankfully not the above one. Open up the compact and you’re assaulted with dozens of blue Smurfs in your face. Congratulations, each time you look in the mirror to wipe something off your mouth, you’ll see blue Smurfs just hanging there. Above your face, below it, to the side — you can’t escape the blue Smurfs. They don’t just go away on their own after all.

You might feel compelled to do something about it, but the most you can do is close the compact and pretend they’re not there. Sure, as if avoidance will make the blue Smurfs disappear. They live in a village full of Smurfs so you can’t blame them for clustering around the first female face they see.

I don't believe in blue Smurfs, but guys tell me otherwise.

And yes, according to Donnie Darko, the Smurfs are sexless. I’m sure that didn’t stop you from reading into all of the above paragraphs, though.